We Tied the Knot!

By the time Misha got the call about the Foreign Service, we had been dating for three years.  We had discussed marriage on several occasions, but didn’t think it was an expenditure we would be able to afford for some time.  And, frankly, we felt no rush. Misha is a big proponent of the FIRE movement, which means Financial Independence, Retire Early.  Having a big wedding complete with a hash tag was never part of our plans.  Still, I wanted to do something to celebrate our love with both of our families present.  Balancing these factors would take a lot of effort, so it was a conversation we decided to floor until it made a little more sense.  Foreign Service life changed all that.

Misha’s A-100 orientation program ran from January 7th to February 21st.  We had been told by several of Misha’s colleagues that getting married before February 21st, Flag Day (a graduation-type ceremony of which I’ll write more about in another post), would make our lives, mine in particular, a whole lot easier.  By doing so, I would get on Misha’s travel orders as her husband, meaning the government would accommodate my travel costs in addition to hers.  As a boyfriend, I’d still be allowed to travel with and live with Misha, but it would be up to me to pay for travel.  Additionally, it also meant being on her health insurance, having access to language and other training programs, and having the chance to work at the embassy.

With all this in mind, the decision to tie the knot sooner than later was a no-brainer.  We’re getting hitched!  Now the question is when, where and how?

Courthouse weddings are common for government and military couples.  Indeed, three or four of Misha’s colleagues in A-100 held their weddings in the weeks before and after we had ours.  Finding an officiant in the DC area is easy because they happen so regularly.  What complicated things was that Misha was not allowed to take time off during A-100. We needed to schedule a time for me to drive down from Boston, get a marriage license, and then meet with an officiant to seal the deal. However, as I’m sure many reading this know, both parties need to be present to get a marriage license, and courthouses just have normal business hours. Without Misha being able to take days off from her condensed, hyper-busy training schedule, this was a small hurdle to overcome.

Luckily, in the weeks leading up to Flag Day, Misha was afforded some “admin time”, which she found out about with a weeks’ notice. During this time she was also finalizing her bid list for potential country assignments (I’ll get into this in another post as well). Throughout this bidding process, we had been trying to find the right time to make it to a courthouse. So, on very short notice, I took a few days off work and drove south. I not-so-gracefully called my parents and said, “I’m getting married on Wednesday in Arlington, VA. Can you make it?”

Of course, my mother had all sorts of requests and recommendations for how we should do things, but this was it.  We were going to get our marriage license during Misha’s admin time.  The next night we were going to get married.  And, the next day I needed to be at work in Massachusetts by 2pm.  As much as I wanted to, our schedule was so time-crunched that we couldn’t even spend the night of our wedding together appreciating this huge life change.  It was not ideal. But, it was still a wonderful night.  My parents made the quick trip down, and Misha’s father and sister, who both live nearby, were able to make it.  My bride was as gorgeous as ever.  We celebrated with a great dinner and a glass of champagne, and agreed to put off the bigger celebrations for a later date.

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